This past weekend was amazing it was 80 degrees and i spent most of the time outside! I went to a football game at EMU. We hung out on the porch and drank while the frat boys across the street were being obnoxious with their bullhorn. When we went out to lunch we'd eat outside, I love it summer is a hop skip and jump away!

I've decided that I need to be a better person in all of the aspects of my life. This is gonna be a long rocky road.

"When other people commit them [sins], you are startled, but when you commit them yourself, they seem absolutely natural." -Elspeth Huxley

The liar's punishment is not being able to believe anyone else.

On some days the clouds, like a curtain obscure the sun from view, every now and then letting us catch a glimpse of it. Just as the earth and nature are to God.

How do we stop chasing dreams that haunt our everyday being?

Early morning, 5am, just you and the morning exist as you step out onto the porch, the purple of dawn is close, but has not quite crept into your existence yet, you smile at this tranquil moment between you and creation.

Today is a grey day outside, it sort of goes with my mood. I want to be happy but I think that I'm looking in all the wrong places. I mean I get bursts of happiness here and there but never a longlasting and fulfilling happiness. It sucks, but I know that most people feel the same way I do. We're busy chasing the wind, always coming up empty handed.

I can't wait till summer's finally here. I miss going out on the boats and swimming but most of all being able to go outside without a coat. I like to be outside, being indoors all winter cramps my style can't wait till the freedom of summer arrives!

One day we will stop falling and hit the ground
One day we will awake from our long winter nap
One day the rain will stop falling and the sun will lift our spirits
One day we'll all realize what we want is not what we need

It is time to grab the reigns and stop drifting on my lazy river
For a while now I have been lulled by the illusion of never leaving the ground so that I may never fly, now is the time!
Otherwise I'll be buried alive and never see the sun again

Maybe I should just stop hanging out with everyone and focus on my future, I feel like, I'm sick of people again, nothing makes me genuinely happy.
It's that whole God-shaped hole thing, I'm always running and he's standing still, I stand still here and there but never long enough to get a real grip, I don't know what I'm afraid of.

(In class)
I'm afraid that I can't listen today, I don't do well with the boring, accounting is awful and I want nothing to do with it. I want to go home and accomplish the tasks that are on my list, so Joes words still haunt me, maybe I should've been an english major, I think maybe he's right, all I need to do is to stop being so f**king lazy, when I go home I need to search job websites, I need a real job and I need it now, and I need to be a better person, I'm not a bad person but I could definately use some improvement.

Slipping under a spell of discontent
The coming warmth of spring is slowly awakening my senses
Today being outside made me smile
I think about my past and I don't know how I feel
The present seems to be stuck in one place
The future is where I need to get, running in circles has gotten me nowhere fast...